Whipping Girl Page 3

  Ivan opens the door to the room and I bypass him without waiting for his okay, I would never dare if it were Peter. Peter is weird and looks at me strangely, but Ivan is different, he thinks it’s funny when I’m so happy to see Alexander. I smile back at him after I’ve entered, waving as he closes the door behind me. When I face the bed my smile falls as I take in the scene. He’s lying on the bed, one arm behind his head and the other thrown across his stomach in a relaxed position but I immediately know something is wrong because his usually tanned face in now pale and slightly scrunched as if he’s in pain. His lips turn up at the corners when he sees me but even that seems to take more energy than he has.

  “Alexander.” I walk quickly toward the bed, kneeling in front of it to search his face. “What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” My eyes well up with tears, hating the thought of something or someone hurting him.

  “I’m alright. I just needed you here is all.” He scoots to one side of the bed, his dark brows furrowing with the effort. He pats the area in front of him -my side of the bed- inviting me to lay beside him in our usual spots. I start to lay down carefully, worried that I might hurt him but he grabs my arm and playfully jerks me down the rest of the way. “Stop it. I said I was alright.”

  “I can tell when you lie to me, you know.” I curl into his side, laying my head on his chest. “Even when you hide your face from me, I can hear it in your voice. I know that you’re hurt.” I stop myself from asking more questions when I see frustration spark in his eyes, he won’t tell me. Either because he can’t or he doesn't want to, I don’t know. “I bet I know how to make you feel better.” I smile, lifting my head to look him in the eyes. “Dalia finally found something that I like, guess what it is? Pottery! I’m really good at it too, I made you some bowls and a vase that I think you will really like but it takes a long time so you probably won't get to see them until next time we’re together.” I take a breath. “Also, Terri thinks that I might be good at ballet because I’m ‘petite’ whatever that means, I’m going to be trying that next week, I’ll try my hardest but I don’t really like dancing.”

  “I’m so happy you found something that you really enjoy, Angel. I have no doubt that I will love them. What else has been going on?” He’s smiling, his dark eyes sparkling even though I know he’s feigning the cheerfulness in his voice. I can see plain as day that he’s still hurting, sweat starts to bead on his forehead and his handshakes as he runs it thought my hair. Normally I love it when he does that but right now I’m scared.

  “Alexander, you’re not dying are you?” I know it frustrates him when I won’t just take him at his word that he’s fine but I can’t help it, I’m afraid somethings going to happen to him. Tears well up in my eyes again, flowing over when I try to blink them away.

  “What? What would make you think that? Stop. Come here and stop with the tears.” I snuggle in tighter to him and try doing as he says but they won't stop, his t-shirt below me becomes wet with them. “What would make you ask if I were dying?”

  “Candace says that what you do can make people try to kill you. I don’t ever want that to happen.” I sob. “Nobody can take you from me.”

  “Shh…” His hand steadies suddenly, then his whole body seems to relax further into the mattress. He continues running his fingers through my hair in long, smooth strokes for a few minutes before he speaks. “Candace should know by now that she needs to keep her mouth shut, I don’t know where she gets that stuff from. Nobody is going to take us away from each other, Ally. I’m not ever going to let that to happen.”

  “They took me from my parents.” I whisper. It’s something that I don’t like to bring up because it always makes Alexander’s body stiffen up but I need his promise that it won’t happen again, that nothing will separate us.

  “Your parents didn’t possess the skills that I have, Angel.” His voice becomes scary, more dark sounding. “They were also limited by the law and their conscious. I don’t have those limitations. Nothing will ever keep us apart, I promise.” Those words should seem really scary, but they’re not. To me they mean everything.

  “I believe you.” I do. If Alexander promised then he means it, he’d never go back on a promise to me.

  “Good. I love hearing you talk and I want to hear everything but would you mind if we slept first? I just need a few hours of sleep and then I’ll be fine.” I nod my head in answer. I’m still scared for him but it’ll be good for him to get some sleep, at least I’m here to look out for him.

  He’s asleep almost immediately and I watch him for what feels like hours. His dreams must be bad at times because he makes noises and his long, black eyelashes flutter like the wings of a bird, it makes me sad that he can’t get peace even in his dreams. When my eyes grow heavy I lay my head back on his chest but when I place my hand on his stomach it feels like he has something under his shirt. Curiosity gets the best of me so I carefully pull it up, seeing a white cloth wrapped around him several times, there are small spots of red that have soaked through making me gasp. I look back up to his face to make sure that I didn’t wake him but his eyes are still closed so I pull his shirt back down gently, trying not to hurt him any more than he already is. Tears fall fast and heavy down my cheeks and I have to bite my lip so that I don’t make noise. Why is he bleeding? Was it the bad guys? Who would hurt such a beautiful boy?

  I would ask him these questions when he woke up but I wouldn’t get any answers, Alexander never tells me anything about what he does while he’s away but I know it must be dangerous and scary, this isn’t the first time that he has been hurt when we’ve been together. Without knowing details, and more than sure that he won’t give me any, all I can do to help him is to make his life easier when we are together. Argue less, complain less, smile more. He seems to have so much stuff that weighs him down, he thinks that I don’t know that he’s not just a regular kid but I do, and I don’t want to add to his worry or be more that he has to carry. I resolve myself to try to be everything that he needs me to be, because he’s everything to me.

  I miss T.V. on days like today, Alexander has been sleeping for a long time but I can’t sleep after seeing his injury so I go between watching him, fiddling with the heart necklace he gave me, and staring at the white ceiling. We don’t have much in our room, the bed, a table with two chairs and two doors, one goes to the small bathroom and the other goes to the hallways. We do have a tote underneath the bed full of books and other learning activities, I love when Alexander teaches me things. Except history, that's boring. There are also some pencils and crayons along with blank sheets of paper that we use to write each other letters and make up our own games, we usually have a lot of fun when he’s not hurt.

  “How long have I been asleep?” I sit up and smile widely at his dark, open eyes.

  “FOREVER!” I say dramatically, making him laugh then wince at the movement. The door opens then, Peter walks in carrying a tray with our supper on it, he doesn't acknowledge us in any way, just sets it on the table before walking back out.

  “It’s dinner time? I didn’t mean to sleep so long, you should have woken me up.” He sits up beside me, rubbing the back of his neck to work out the kinks.

  “I’m sorry, you looked like you needed it.” I avoid his eyes, walking to the table I lift the top off of our food but immediately replace it with a sigh. “Liver and onions. Again.” I wrinkle my nose causing Alexander to chuckle.

  “It may not be your favorite but it’s good for you so you have to eat it, alright?”

  “Yes, Alexander.” I say softly, sitting in my chair at the table. Alexander walks over and sits in his seat, eyebrows raised in surprise at my easy acceptance.

  “No argument?” He narrows his eyes, searching my face. I squirm in my seat nervously, I hate when he does that, I think one of his superpowers is mind reading. “You saw.”

  “No!” I say quickly. “I saw nothing.”

  “Ally, I’ve told you on numerous occasions not to lie to me, you ne
ed to just give that up right now, you’re not good at it. Were you searching for something?” He asks, his dark eyes narrowing further on mine as he waits for my answer.

  “I knew you were hurt. I felt something under your shirt and I lifted it. There was blood.” I finish so softly that I don’t know if he heard me. My tears start again, making me feel like a baby. I hate that I cry so easily, Alexander never cries even when he’s the one that’s in pain, I wish I was as strong as him. He sighs then stands, walking to my seat and kneeling in front of me, he pulls me into a tight hug, holding me like that for a long time and only pulls away after my tears stop.

  “You shouldn’t worry about me, I’m a Super Hero, remember?” He bites his lips to keep his face serious. “I have super strength, super hearing, and super healing abilities.” I laugh, I know it’s silly but that’s what I picture from him when we're not together, he’s like Batman, Superman, Ironman and Thor all put together, at least in my mind anyway. My face loses its smile when I remember what we were talking about.

  “Can you tell me-“

  “No.” He interrupts. “I’m alright, that’s all you need to know.”

  “Alright.” It makes me sad that he can’t share things with me but I don’t want him to get mad if I don’t let it go.

  “I’ll make you a deal, if you eat all of your food then we’ll do whatever you want.” I smile wide at that, thinking of all of the girly stuff that I could make him do.

  “Alright, you’ve got yourself a deal.”

  We’re lying in bed that night after lights out when Alexander turns on his side to face me, I can barely see any of his features but I know his face is serious when he speaks.

  “What do you see in our future, Angel?” I’m not surprised by the question, we talk about things like this all the time.

  “Hmm... I see a big house filled with color, it will be somewhere quiet with trees surrounding it, oh, and it has to have a large porch.” I smile as I picture it in my mind.

  “Keep going. What else?” He nudges me.

  “We’ll have two dogs that will run to us when we come home and maybe an aquarium filled with lots of those bright colored fish, you know what I’m talking about?”

  “Yeah, I know what you’re talking about. Any kids?”

  “Of course. If we’re going to get married then we have to have kids.” I tell him.

  “You want to marry me someday?” His voice tells me that he’s smiling as he asks and under the cover of darkness I blush, glad he can’t see me.

  “You don’t want to marry me?” I counter quietly, holding my breath as I wait for his answer.

  “I’m absolutely going to marry you someday, I was just wondering if I was going to need to convince you when the time came.” My face heats further but I don’t respond to his statement, instead I ask a question of my own.

  “What about you, what do you see?” Now it’s my turn to nudge. He takes a moment to respond, probably thinking hard about his answer.

  “Everything you just named sounds good to me, anything you want.” He says. Alexander is a great listener but he’s not the best talker.

  “No, that’s not how the game works. I told you what I see, now you have to tell me.”

  “I don’t really care what will surround us, Ally, because all I see in my future is you.”

  Chapter 4 – Alexander - 11 years ago

  “Alexander!” Ally launches herself at me as soon as she is through the door, her thin arms and legs both go around me and I catch her small body easily. I hold her to me tightly, so damn happy to have her here after three long weeks without her, she feels like heaven against me as I move us toward our small bed. I lay her down then lay next to her, I am unable to let her go so I curl myself around her in an attempt to soothe myself. I have been upped in the ranks, I am now handling much riskier contracts and some of the things that I have seen in the last few weeks have stayed with me, burrowing into my soul like black tar, I thought that I had seen it all until now.. I had thought that I had seen real monsters but I’m starting to realize that there are all different kinds of evil in this world. A full body shiver runs through me at the memory so I hold her just a little bit tighter but she doesn’t complain, she never complains when I seek comfort in her. I fill my lungs with her sweet scent hoping that it will replace my disgust and shame at myself, Ally always makes everything easier, I couldn’t survive without her.

  My Handlers are allowing me a full week with Ally as a reward for my success but afterwards they are going to have to put me back in the conditioning cell, I may have succeeded but I’m also showing too much of a reaction to what I have seen for their liking. A full week of Ally is all that I am thinking about right now, I know I have hell ahead of me but all I can focus on right now is the comforting feel of my girl against me. She smells like apples and sunshine, like survival and life. I’ll soak up every second and commit it to memory so I can replay it over and over in my mind while I’m in hell.

  “What have you been up to? I’ve missed you so much.” I say into her long blonde hair, it’s grown to her waist now, I won’t allow her to cut it because I love running my fingers through the long, silky strands. She pretends like it’s such a hassle to keep it so lengthy but it calms us both when I comb through it with my fingers, I can put her to sleep in minutes by doing nothing but that.

  “I’m learning to play the piano.” She tells me unenthusiastically, I laugh because the girls’ Handlers are always trying to keep our Gifts entertained and stimulated with new things, Ally has one passion and one passion only, and she likes to make pottery from clay. It’s the only thing she loves to do outside of this room but they always try to get her interested in new things. “I’m not good at it, I don’t know why Dalia won’t just give up, I like clay, what’s wrong with that?” She huffs. Dalia isn't her favorite person, Ally hates both of her Handlers but that one in particular seems to really get on her nerves. I listen as she talks about all the new activities that she has been doing, a few conversations that she’s had with the other Gifts in the cafeteria and the books she’s been reading. I love hearing her talk, she makes me forget everything that I’ve been through, you could say that she is my only passion. “I missed you. Where do you go for so long?” She asks, her big green eyes searching mine.

  “You know I can’t talk about that.” I answer with a furrowed brow. I hate keeping secrets from her but I don’t ever want her to know about the things that I have had to do, I would never wish those kinds of nightmares on anyone. I’d rather that she believed the stories that she likes to come up with, she imagines that I’m on all sorts of fun adventures, she’s told me in vivid detail about some of the things that she thinks of me doing, like becoming a masked hero outside of The Guard and saving people from evil villains. I wish they were true, I wish I could be the hero but I’m afraid that I’m closer to the villain in this story. I run a finger over the freckles on her cheeks, realizing that she has a few new ones. They don’t allow our Gifts outside, ever, so they put them in a room with sunlamps a few times a week. It’s not the same thing and I know Ally misses the outdoors but she never complains because she doesn’t want me to feel bad for her, but I see the longing in her eyes sometimes when we read books together, if there are outdoor scenes she always gets quiet, like she’s picturing it in her mind.

  “I know.” She sighs. Now that the high of being together has worn off a bit she seems a little sad, there is nothing that tears at me more than when she’s not happy.

  “What’s wrong.” I grab her cheek and turn her back toward me when she looks away with a small shrug. “Tell me.” I demand firmly but gently, I never accept anything but complete honestly from her and a shrug just isn’t going to cut it.

  “Nothing. I just got into an argument with Candace. She said some things about you- not just you.” She adds quickly, probably seeing my eyes darken and my jaw clench. “Zeke, Seth, Toby and Andrew, all of you.” She looks at the black shirt covering my chest a
nd starts to draw random patterns, avoiding my eyes. There are five trainees total, there used to be ten of us but this is a risky Organization, some of us don’t always come back. I get along all right with the others, but most of us aren’t close, we don’t really spend a lot of time together but we talk occasionally when we are assigned contracts together. Candace has been a problem from the start, she is Zeke’s Gift but their connection doesn’t seem to have worked as well as the rest of us, something just didn’t click the way that it was supposed to. Zeke got Candace a few months before I got Ally and I can see the disconnect between the two them which is dangerous, if he’s not living for her then he has no real purpose in this life that we were given.

  “What did she say?” I ask, trying to keep my voice casual but even I can hear the edge to it, I seem to be able to keep all of my emotions in tact anywhere but in this room, to anyone except my girl.

  “She just... she says that you guys don’t really love any of us, that you aren’t truly capable of it.” She takes a deep breath before continuing, still unable to meet my eyes. “She says that you were only programmed to need me and that none of your feelings for me are real.” I have to force my hand to stay gentle as I continue running it through her blonde locks. I take in her rushed words, running them through my head while I try to calm myself. I want to fucking strangle Candace, she’s always trying to put things in Ally’s head that don’t belong there because she could never understand the link that Ally and I share. I think she’s jealous of it and I have told Ally that on multiple occasions, I can’t control what my girl hears outside of this room.. I wish that I could.